I want.

  1. I want to be a mother I’m proud of, which means following my heart and not the crowd – teaching my daughters to do the same. And apologizing to them a lot – I can be a real dick.
  2. I want to work for myself as a divorce and mindset coach. I know I’m excellent at holding clean space, with no judgement and no drama – but I do call it as I see it. Show you the facts and demand that you take the time to find your thoughts about them. And I cuss a lot. My people are out there.
  3. I want my body to feel as strong as my mind feels – mobility, flexibility, breathing, releasing. I still wanna carry my girls in from the car. I’m not ready to give that up yet.
  4. I want to see this house through to completion. So. Many. Projects.
  5. Then I want to stay in it for awhile and be able to enjoy it. Not forever. Maybe keep it for forever, but not live in it for forever. Real estate’s generally a solid investment.
  6. Sometimes I wanna get back with their dad. For the most part I’m over it, and I know it’ll never happen. I couldn’t let it happen. But sometimes I want it. And I’m not interested in hearing anyone’s thoughts on that.
  7. I want to own a two bedroom/two bath apartment on Manhattan so my daughters and I can escape the Midwest regularly and soak up some fucking culture.
  8. I want to get laid. Often and well.
  9. I want to have a partner and to be a partner. What that partnership looks like exactly is to be determined. I do know that I do not want to share my closet.
  10. I want to employ Carmen – the Mexican woman I used to work with, with the beautiful soul and kind eyes. She doesn’t really speak English and I don’t really speak Spanish, but we got each other. She is special to me.
  11. I want to hone the skill of slowing down and really being present – creating more internal peace and less internal overwhelm. I am capable. So fucking capable. I know it.
  12. I want to talk to my dad again.
  13. I want to buy Dorothy her boobs for her 50th
  14. I want a 1987 Monte Carlo SS T-top. Black with the red stripe. Otherwise, the burgundy will do.
  15. I want to give a TED Talk. I’m a better listener than a talker, but I’ve got a lot to say.
  16. I want to have lunch with Tim Gunn. We watch a lot of Project Runway in our house and I’ve grown to adore that man for so many reasons. Mostly his compassion and refined candor.
  17. I want to visit Okinawa.
  18. I want to learn to ride a motorcycle. And take my daughters to Sturgis.
  19. I want to create a life for myself that has as few rules as possible outside of my own requirements and expectations that I set for me. I hate being told what to do by people who don’t know what the fuck they’re doing.
  20. I want to want. Freely and bigly. And that starts with not only wanting everything I’ve already got, but accepting it. Believing that it’s mine and I’m worthy of it. And I do. I have a beautiful life.

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